Madshitter strikes the EPA

Pat submitted another report from internalmemos.com. Is it ironic that the EPA cannot even protect themselves from the omnipresence of the mad shitter? I don't know, ask a literalist.

HQ Emergency Notification
To: Federal Triangle Broadcast (AR, Customs, ICC, RR)
08/21/02 09:25
cc:
Subject: Security Incidents in the EPA East Building

FROM: Morris X. Winn, Assistant Administrator
Office of Administration and Resources Management

TO: EPA Federal Triangle Complex Employees

Over the past several days, employees may have heard of incidents occurring in certain employees' work stations regarding an apparent deposit of human bodily fluids on computer keyboards and work areas. Members of OARM's security and health and safety staffs have brought in the Federal Protective Service (FPS). In addition, affected employees and their managers have been briefed. I wanted to share appropriate information with all of you to try to minimize fear or confusion.

We take these incidents very seriously and our primary concern is the safety and security of all of our employees. Our security and health and safety staffs have involved the FPS and obtained the assistance of other Federal law enforcement entities regarding protective security and other appropriate measures. The fluids have been analyzed by professional forensics laboratory staff and do not pose a threat of health risk. Nonetheless, our immediate goal is to stop any recurrence and to identify the responsible individual. I have been advised by the FPS that it is not advisable to provide further specific information, but I want to personally assure you that we are taking every available step to address this situation and will keep you informed of any further developments. If you see or have seen any suspicious or unusual activity, please call EPA's Security Command Center at 564-2205.

PS- Isn't InternalMemos run by Pud over at fuckedcompany.com?